Gratitude
I've been trying to think of how to do this for days, weeks maybe. How to express thanks. I've been touched by so many people over the last few months in so many different ways. Who ever thought that you could be so thoroughly heartbroken and yet so thoroughly soaked in a feeling of love that you feel as though your heart was overflowing with it all at the same time? It's possible and it's confusing.
I would love to thank you all individually. Hug each of you and let you know in just the right way how much you've touched me. How much you've helped, how your acts of generosity, kindness, time, words, gifts, patience, phone calls, text messages, flowers, presence, hugs, food, conversation, shelter, rides, organization, ideas, etc have somehow impacted my family or I in a big way. But I don't even know who all contributed. And I don't know how to say it in the exact right way. But I sure as hell am going to try.
The last three months are a bit of a haze. Hindsight has a way of doing that to a person. And today Dad walked out of inpatient rehab. Maybe that's what finally enabled me to write this. That chapter is finally closing. His rehabilitation isn't done, but his inpatient status is finally over. This was his 82nd continuous day of inpatient status. I was by his side for 56 of those days. I have no idea how many nurses, doctors, aides, fellows, residents and other staff played a part in saving my dad's life. I can name most of the ones I met. There's a few I can guarantee I will never forget. I know I thanked them, but I still don't think they grasped how deep and heartfelt that thanks went. And while all of that was happening there were so many people who visited, who sent us messages, emails, texts, and called to check on us. I lost track of how many offers we received to check on Dad's house, pick up mail, cut his grass or start his car.
And when the true gravity of how long and hard this was going to be and how much this was going to cost really hit us? Our communities stepped up in such a gigantic way for us. I talked for 14 straight hours at the benefit and poker run that was held. I heard stories about my mom and dad. I saw friends I haven't seen in years. I saw faces I was shocked to see. I hugged so many sweaty people this past Saturday that I don't even want to know how much DNA I was covered in. I started losing my voice. I still don't really have it back completely. I did a Facebook live to show the raffle baskets that were donated and it took me almost 9 minutes just to show them all. And more showed up later. That's insane to me. How do you thank people, really thank people for that?
There are different ways of properly thanking someone. You can simply say thank you. To me, you just always say thank you. But simple thank yous are just what you do. You say thank you to the stranger in front of you at the store who holds the door open for you.
If a really good friend surprises you with a sweet gift out of the blue, you say thank you. But maybe next time you are out somewhere and see something that makes you think of her, you purchase the item and return the gesture. Now you've used words to express gratitude and you've also shown it through return action.
Maybe you're struggling, and a friend lets you stay with them for a few weeks. You are in no position to help them financially, but you appreciate their assistance greatly. You use words to say thank you. You make sure not to leave their home a mess and do not overstay your welcome. You find a new place to live and remain friends. Then months later the friend needs help with volunteer work. You think to yourself, this friend really helped me out of a jam, I want to express my thanks, I'll go and help them by volunteering with their event. Now you've expressed your appreciation by being present when they've needed you.
I'm outlining all of this for you because these are all of the ways I've been taught to show gratitude, appreciation and thanks. And everything that has been done for us goes way beyond a simple Thank You. Now I'm in no way saying I'll be capable of being present at every single thing that's requested of me in Pennsylvania and Ohio (I live in Indiana and have three kids), but I'll do my best to repay the kindness I've been shown. And I've always believed in paying it forward (yes, even at the Starbucks drive thru because people need overpriced coffee, don't argue with me about this.)
I can say that because of all of you, we were able to spend a lot more time focused on getting Dad the care he needed instead of worrying about the trivial stuff. We knew we weren't alone. And when we needed to vent or we needed a break, you were there for that too. You helped keep our spirits up. You helped answer our questions and make phone calls we didn't always have time to make ourselves. You fed us. And when we realized we couldn't pull a magic money bearing rabbit out of a hat, you helped us find another way. You made sure we had a place to stay. You made sure we had distraction or a laugh. Maybe a lot of laughs. You made sure we had a shoulder when we needed it. And you made sure that the spirit of Momma Lisa was everywhere through it all. She would be so proud of all of us. For coming together, for laughing, for surviving this craziness. For telling stories, for making it work.
I truly hope I have done some justice to the amount of gratitude that is coursing through me for each and every one of you. Thank you. Truly.
I would love to thank you all individually. Hug each of you and let you know in just the right way how much you've touched me. How much you've helped, how your acts of generosity, kindness, time, words, gifts, patience, phone calls, text messages, flowers, presence, hugs, food, conversation, shelter, rides, organization, ideas, etc have somehow impacted my family or I in a big way. But I don't even know who all contributed. And I don't know how to say it in the exact right way. But I sure as hell am going to try.
The last three months are a bit of a haze. Hindsight has a way of doing that to a person. And today Dad walked out of inpatient rehab. Maybe that's what finally enabled me to write this. That chapter is finally closing. His rehabilitation isn't done, but his inpatient status is finally over. This was his 82nd continuous day of inpatient status. I was by his side for 56 of those days. I have no idea how many nurses, doctors, aides, fellows, residents and other staff played a part in saving my dad's life. I can name most of the ones I met. There's a few I can guarantee I will never forget. I know I thanked them, but I still don't think they grasped how deep and heartfelt that thanks went. And while all of that was happening there were so many people who visited, who sent us messages, emails, texts, and called to check on us. I lost track of how many offers we received to check on Dad's house, pick up mail, cut his grass or start his car.
And when the true gravity of how long and hard this was going to be and how much this was going to cost really hit us? Our communities stepped up in such a gigantic way for us. I talked for 14 straight hours at the benefit and poker run that was held. I heard stories about my mom and dad. I saw friends I haven't seen in years. I saw faces I was shocked to see. I hugged so many sweaty people this past Saturday that I don't even want to know how much DNA I was covered in. I started losing my voice. I still don't really have it back completely. I did a Facebook live to show the raffle baskets that were donated and it took me almost 9 minutes just to show them all. And more showed up later. That's insane to me. How do you thank people, really thank people for that?
There are different ways of properly thanking someone. You can simply say thank you. To me, you just always say thank you. But simple thank yous are just what you do. You say thank you to the stranger in front of you at the store who holds the door open for you.
If a really good friend surprises you with a sweet gift out of the blue, you say thank you. But maybe next time you are out somewhere and see something that makes you think of her, you purchase the item and return the gesture. Now you've used words to express gratitude and you've also shown it through return action.
Maybe you're struggling, and a friend lets you stay with them for a few weeks. You are in no position to help them financially, but you appreciate their assistance greatly. You use words to say thank you. You make sure not to leave their home a mess and do not overstay your welcome. You find a new place to live and remain friends. Then months later the friend needs help with volunteer work. You think to yourself, this friend really helped me out of a jam, I want to express my thanks, I'll go and help them by volunteering with their event. Now you've expressed your appreciation by being present when they've needed you.
I'm outlining all of this for you because these are all of the ways I've been taught to show gratitude, appreciation and thanks. And everything that has been done for us goes way beyond a simple Thank You. Now I'm in no way saying I'll be capable of being present at every single thing that's requested of me in Pennsylvania and Ohio (I live in Indiana and have three kids), but I'll do my best to repay the kindness I've been shown. And I've always believed in paying it forward (yes, even at the Starbucks drive thru because people need overpriced coffee, don't argue with me about this.)
I can say that because of all of you, we were able to spend a lot more time focused on getting Dad the care he needed instead of worrying about the trivial stuff. We knew we weren't alone. And when we needed to vent or we needed a break, you were there for that too. You helped keep our spirits up. You helped answer our questions and make phone calls we didn't always have time to make ourselves. You fed us. And when we realized we couldn't pull a magic money bearing rabbit out of a hat, you helped us find another way. You made sure we had a place to stay. You made sure we had distraction or a laugh. Maybe a lot of laughs. You made sure we had a shoulder when we needed it. And you made sure that the spirit of Momma Lisa was everywhere through it all. She would be so proud of all of us. For coming together, for laughing, for surviving this craziness. For telling stories, for making it work.
I truly hope I have done some justice to the amount of gratitude that is coursing through me for each and every one of you. Thank you. Truly.
Comments