Word of the Year
I'm supposed to be getting ready to go to bed. I have to get up early and deal with the rental car that is the fall out of the destroyed tire that was 2019's parting gift to me. Instead I was struck with inspiration. Inspiration always wins out over common sense.
I'm not a resolutions type of person. I fall flat in a matter of hours with those stupid things. It feels too much like someone else telling me what to do even though I'm the one who made them. And as soon as I feel too restricted I feel an overwhelming urge to rebel. Also resolutions always feel typical. Sure I could stand to lose weight - but that's not something I'm overly interested in doing. And if people don't want to be around me because I have too many chins or extra rolls around my middle they aren't exactly the type of person I really want to be associated with anyway.
I'm a thematic person. I like the idea of choosing a word of the year, or a theme. I'm pretty sure last year I was trying to be more satisfied with the things I had. I was basically trying to stop buying extra shit I don't need. I knew we were going to have to snug up that budget once I found a job in Indiana and I needed to quit buying every skein of pretty yarn just for the hell of it. I ended up being entirely too distracted by everything else falling apart around me to care one iota about pretty yarn being bought. So I feel like it was a success.
I've been lost on this year's word. I thought about Journey. Survive. Thrive. I considered pulling out a thesaurus. But just as I was patting myself on the back for an incredibly productive day today, and how well I managed to focus on the positive things instead of all of the shitty parts, it hit me. Focus. That should be it. Focus. Focus on getting this mess cleaned up. Focus on the positive things. Like the fact that I managed to accomplish things at work even though I only worked half a day. Focus on the fact that I managed to still go to the bank, grocery shop, put the groceries away, go to my doctor's appointment, clean the nasty kitchen counters, finish laundry, fold towels and put them away, call family, talk to a friend, get my tire changed, go put air in my other three tires, make myself dinner, make tomorrow's lunch, prep the ingredients for dinner tomorrow and lay out clothes for tomorrow. My house still looks like a hoarder moved in. My back hurts and I'm typing this with a heating pad laid across my shoulders, but look how much I got done!! I even did dishes. And I took out trash. I used lots of colorful language to assist me in most of those tasks. But instead of focusing on wanting to dismember the humans I live with, I focused on getting the job done.
I may change my mind later, but after the day I've had, I feel like Focus is the current winner.
I'm not a resolutions type of person. I fall flat in a matter of hours with those stupid things. It feels too much like someone else telling me what to do even though I'm the one who made them. And as soon as I feel too restricted I feel an overwhelming urge to rebel. Also resolutions always feel typical. Sure I could stand to lose weight - but that's not something I'm overly interested in doing. And if people don't want to be around me because I have too many chins or extra rolls around my middle they aren't exactly the type of person I really want to be associated with anyway.
I'm a thematic person. I like the idea of choosing a word of the year, or a theme. I'm pretty sure last year I was trying to be more satisfied with the things I had. I was basically trying to stop buying extra shit I don't need. I knew we were going to have to snug up that budget once I found a job in Indiana and I needed to quit buying every skein of pretty yarn just for the hell of it. I ended up being entirely too distracted by everything else falling apart around me to care one iota about pretty yarn being bought. So I feel like it was a success.
I've been lost on this year's word. I thought about Journey. Survive. Thrive. I considered pulling out a thesaurus. But just as I was patting myself on the back for an incredibly productive day today, and how well I managed to focus on the positive things instead of all of the shitty parts, it hit me. Focus. That should be it. Focus. Focus on getting this mess cleaned up. Focus on the positive things. Like the fact that I managed to accomplish things at work even though I only worked half a day. Focus on the fact that I managed to still go to the bank, grocery shop, put the groceries away, go to my doctor's appointment, clean the nasty kitchen counters, finish laundry, fold towels and put them away, call family, talk to a friend, get my tire changed, go put air in my other three tires, make myself dinner, make tomorrow's lunch, prep the ingredients for dinner tomorrow and lay out clothes for tomorrow. My house still looks like a hoarder moved in. My back hurts and I'm typing this with a heating pad laid across my shoulders, but look how much I got done!! I even did dishes. And I took out trash. I used lots of colorful language to assist me in most of those tasks. But instead of focusing on wanting to dismember the humans I live with, I focused on getting the job done.
I may change my mind later, but after the day I've had, I feel like Focus is the current winner.
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